When Beekeepers Party

<>I took my wife to the “Bee Bawl” at the Eastern Apiculture Society conference in Newark, DE. This is where beekeepers dress up in bee-apparel and get down. There were lots of prizes for most creative, bee hats, bee shoes, etc. One group from The government research lab in Georgia came as hive beetles. That made me want to dress as a giant Coumophos Tab.

One woman wore a halter and white hot pants with the word BEE-HIND printed across her gluteous maximus. Another guy, late sixties, maybe 250 lbs, unhooked his suspenders, dropped his overalls and showed us his bee underwear. He posed with the babe for pictures. I didn’t take any. The lighting was terrible. Maybe it will make the cover of Bee Culture. Editor Kim must have snapped half a thousand pictures that night. I suggested he could put me on the cover. He shoved me up against the wall and snapped a dozen. I came as a yellow jacket drone.

One of the great paradoxes of beekeeping: The practioners of the art are mostly old guys with Santa Claus beards and drooping bellies. The government and university researchers are cute young chicks (and some middle age cute chicks). The lesson to undergrads: if you want to make money, study law or software engineering. If you want to find cute young girls, you have to be a beekeeper.